Absolution
by br41nz
Summary: Trust, once broken, can never be regained. A cycle of selfishness can never become love. Deidara fights these cliches bitterly, but there's only so much one man can do.


**! some beginning notes:** first and foremost, this is my first voyage into the Naruto universe, so excuse me if I don't get every detail absolutely correct. secondly, this is a Deidara x Sakura. so don't expect anything else. WARNING RIGHT NOW, this first chapter does contain some nonconsensual sex... THAT MEANS RAPE. unfortunate but necessary to the plot. also, I don't own Naruto or any of its characters... and hell, I'm probably not even the first to try this plot out. so maybe I don't own that either. I do, however, write all of this myself at my nerdy little laptop, so give me credit where it's due.

perhaps most importantly... pleaseee review and let me know if you like, hate, want more, or whatever else. I don't do those stupid "40 reviews till my next update!1" things, but if I get discouraged I may never write again. ever.

now on with the show.

**xxxxxxx**

**ABSOLUTION**

**xxxxxxx**

Sakura Haruno exhaled deeply, narrowed eyes fixated on the hunched form of her current target. He wasn't the mission; she knew he was a risky diversion from her scroll, an unexpected distraction from her run-of-the-mill assassination objective.

She looked warily at the man who was _supposed _to be her kill of the night. He was seated in the smokiest corner of the pub, giving a vivacious reenactment of a recent business meeting to a group of grey-haired peers. He was old- late fifties, possibly -and tall, thin and imposing, with thick-rimmed glasses and a navy suit. It wouldn't be difficult to kill him without too much notice, but dragging him away from his group would mean enticing him into a more _secluded_ room.

Sakura shuddered. She hated missions like this, where she felt demoralized and used.

Her eyes shifted discreetly to her newfound target. This man, on the other hand, was young and tan with a huge grin and long blonde hair. His lean arms banged jovially against the wooden bar as he begged the scowling bartender for more whiskey. He loudly shouted the beginnings of an old drinking song, but let it die down shortly after and instead looked offhandedly around the smoky room. When his gaze met hers he paused, giving her a once-over followed by a flirtatious wink. Sakura reddened and looked away coyly. He shrugged and returned his gaze to the sullen bartender, who was glaring fiercely at his rowdy patron.

Sakura tried to will the blood from her cheeks and focused her attention on the frosted window in front of her. She felt an itch creep up her scalp, and she cursed the thick black wig that was fastened securely to her head. She thanked her lucky stars that she had decided to don the plain wig- otherwise, the blonde man at the bar would have almost surely immediately recognized her. Sakura shifted nervously, wanting to wipe her tired eyes but refraining for the sake of her extravagant makeup.

_Deidara_. The name rang ominously in her mind, conjuring images of scattered body parts and massive detonations. His murder was completely necessary, and Sakura was certain that Tsunade would excuse her insolence- after all, he was a notorious terrorist and an active member of one of the most dangerous group of shinobi known to man. He was, ultimately, someone who had ruined more lives and hurt _her_ more deeply than this big-time businessman telling lively stories to his friends. The mission didn't matter now, and neither did the relatively small commission. She wondered if her wizened mentor would understand, or if this minute duplicity would unravel the deep trust between them.

Sakura sighed repentantly, and snuck another glance at the blonde criminal. He looked so agreeable, so charismatic; as she studied him, he patted another man on the back, demanding that they share another round together. He was laughing, a red tint splashed along the angled contours of his face, revealing his drunkenness. He had a magnetic sort of aura. Sakura thought that, under different circumstances, he might even be cute.

Sakura knew that, somehow, she would have to lead him upstairs, like she had intended with her first target. She would have to guide him away from the crowded comradery of the bar, and into the promising warmth of the upstairs bedrooms.

She usually didn't have a problem with sex- she had experienced it before, and she considered herself a fairly adept sexual partner. She frowned while mulling over memories of Naruto, clumsy and elated, fumbling with buttons and hooks and straps as he pushed her excitedly into bed. Her face heated as she recalled the slow, torturous teasing of Kiba as he lead her patiently from foreplay into violent love-making.

This was a whole new world, though. An S-class criminal was someone to be engaged under only the most extreme of cases- and though the young, smiling man at the bar seemed at worst a mischievous playboy, Sakura knew him to be a psychotic killer with… explosive tendencies. She swallowed hard. He seemed interested in her looks, and that definitely simplified the first half of her task, but it would be an uncertain end, and she wondered if she should just turn back now.

'Oh, come on,' Inner Sakura barked, breaking into her hectic thoughts, 'he's a man. He feels lust, and he won't be expecting _you_ to be any sort of physical threat.'

Sakura mulled over this, almost nodding as she found herself in complete concurrence. There was no way he would expect her- no way he could ever know that she was the Leaf ninja who had killed his partner years ago. She was older, curvier, and her hair was covered in this (annoying) wig. She had lost most of her preteen awkwardness, and her forehead seemed like slightly less of an embarrassment than it had so many years ago. Sakura exhaled again, convincing herself slowly of her aesthetic worth.

"Bartender," Deidara shouted impatiently into the air and then slammed his face into the wooden bar loudly. He mumbled some incoherent words.

'And anyway,' Her inner-self whispered, 'he appears to be really, really inebriated.'

Sakura stared at him in open contempt, certain that he wouldn't be looking her way for a moment. He did seem severely drunk, and as she thought this he even teetered uncertainly on his bar stool.

Sakura breathed in deeply and stood, feeling convinced that no man this trashed could refuse her feminine advances. She took a step forward, and then halted. She bit the inside of her cheek. Her hesitance would only cost her in the long run, she knew, and if she looked up she would appear to be a foolish teenager, reluctant to admit her attraction amidst feelings of inadequacy.

Sakura shook off her thoughts and strode forward assertively, adopting a cool look of indifference. She hoped silently that she looked sexy. Her dress was hand-picked after hours of careful debate- a simple thigh-length kimono, silky and blue to compliment her faux hair. Her cleavage spilled out nicely from the sloping v-neck, and her ass felt barely covered by the sparse material. It wasn't classy, certainly, but that had never been the goal.

'What if he doesn't like women?' The unexpected thought struck her violently, spreading nefariously throughout her nervous mind. She blanched and faltered, coughing to mask the snide laughter that bubbled up at her consideration. Deidara removed his reddened face from the bar. He turned urgently, maybe seeking a trashcan, but instead meeting her awkward emerald gaze. He paused again and, perhaps perceiving her hesitance to approach, allowed a broad grin to slither across his face. He motioned indistinctly for her to come closer.

Sakura complied soundlessly, broadcasting a fake smile and twisting her curled ebony locks, trying to angle herself so that her breasts poked out beguilingly. Deidara perked at her aggressive charm, and turned his body to better receive her.

"Hi," Sakura began breathlessly, fingers still twining her hair mindlessly.

"Helloo," Deidara began, slurring a little. Sakura noticed with inexplicable unease that only one of his eyes was visible.

"I'm Reina," Sakura offered, settling herself on the stool next to the Akatsuki member.

"Reina?" Deidara repeated, and his eyes creased thoughtfully. "That's exotic, yeah."

"Yes," Sakura agree as she moved to take a seat on the stool adjacent to the blonde. "My parents traveled a lot."

"Fascinating," Deidara breathed, as though it were the most dull topic in the world. "I'm Dei."

"Just Dei?" Sakura prodded, flashing him an innocent look as she settled onto her stool.

"Just Dei," He repeated quietly, though her question appeared to have sobered him slightly. Sakura nearly winced, wondering belatedly what she had expected to gain from her inquiry.

"That's sexy," Sakura amended, giving him a small smirk.

Deidara grinned at her wolfishly, all suspicions forgotten, and lifted a hand to gesture broadly to the bar. "Want a drink? On me, yeah."

"On ME," Snorted the annoyed bartender, who was listlessly wiping at a chipped cup. "You outsiders think you don't have to pay, you sneak off while I'm sweeping the back."

"Hey!" Deidara feigned a look of hurt, and then leaned forward to whisper gently in Sakura's ear, "but he's right. It really _is_ on him, yeah." Sakura inhaled, affected by the proximity of the (very cute) criminal. Deidara didn't move back after finishing his joke, instead catching her eyes with his own steamy gaze. Sakura felt her stomach twist in what she uncomfortably identified as arousal.

"No," Sakura finally murmured, refusing to avert her eyes from their intense staring contest. "I don't drink."

"Make tonight an exception, yeah," Deidara suggested, and straightened suddenly, moving to lift his own half-empty drink to his chapped lips.

"I can't," Sakura insisted, finally looking away, pretending to glance around worriedly for a clock. "I should actually get home soon..."

"Unacceptable!" Deidara declared, frowning at her. "We've only just met. I'll walk you home, if you're worried about the dark."

Sakura arched an incredulous brow in open surprise, charmed by the sweet gesture, but quickly attributed his kindness to simple manipulation. She smiled politely and thanked him. "But I still won't have anything, I don't think."

"Suit yourself," Deidara shrugged, throwing his own drink back with renewed enthusiasm. His face scrunched as he choked down a large gag, followed by a deep, racking cough. Sakura hummed disapprovingly, and then regretted it as he shot her an irate glare. "I've had a lot to drink," He defended himself, staring thoughtfully into his mug. "I love whiskey, yeah."

Sakura nodded uninterestedly, and then smoothed her dress down. "I don't drink much," She admitted, and met his questioning eye.

"Then," Deidara began, keeping a cool eye contact even as he waved his drink urgently for a refill, "what are you doing in a bar? By yourself?"

'Idiot!' Inner Sakura fumed. _'I don't drink, I go home at nine o'clock_- _don't have sex with me, I'm a sober prude_!'

Sakura blanched, unable to defend herself. She worried for a fleeting moment that she had invalidated her facade. She looked distractedly to the drunken businessman, wondering if it was too late to revert to her assignment obediently.

"I was supposed to meet a friend," she began in a far-off voice, eyes traveling the length of the dusty shelf above the bar, "but it looks like they've found something better to do."

Deidara looked curiously at her. "A _boy_ friend?" He probed, keeping his voice nonchalant.

"Yes," Sakura breathed, hoping it was the right answer. Deidara's visible eye lit with sudden interest, and Sakura knew from experience that this was the look a man adopted when he felt challenged.

"Well, you have me instead," He offered chivalrously, gentlemanly charm rolling off of him in waves. "And I would never stand such a pretty girl up, yeah."

Sakura blushed prettily and shot him a demure smile. "Maybe that's why you're here," she teased lightly. "Standing some other pretty girl up somewhere else in town."

Deidara grinned and, with something akin to regret in his eyes, told her ruefully that his line of work didn't allow him to date often, accompanied with another irritating 'yeah'. Sakura silently agreed, but instead just pursed her lips. "How tragic, for such a cute boy to be so preoccupied,"

"Have a drink, yeah," Deidara begged suddenly, and the bartender reappeared conveniently with a tall glass of something foul smelling and dark. Sakura gulped, suddenly aware of how unfamiliar she was with drinking, and worried about the effect an impaired mind would have on her mission.

She eyed the cup warily, opening her mouth to decline, when she momentarily caught Deidara's eye. He was staring at her in a chillingly sober manner, with a guarded expression that reminded her of a hunter's. Her mouth went dry. He was suspicious of her- she was dressed like a small town hooker, but she was acting like a prudent mother. Her contradictions were putting him on edge, and he seemed to be sizing her up in a manner past sexuality now. He was evaluating her threat level.

She felt sick as she smiled spontaneously and shouted a quick, "Oh, what the hell," before snatching the full mug and taking a huge swallow. Her taste buds immediately protested, attacked by the horrible taste that shot like liquid fire down her throat. Her insides felt charred. She gagged and then wheezed, dry heaving in hopes of removing the awful taste from her mouth, her eyes squinting unattractively as she searched frantically for a glass of water. Her search was in vain, but she happened to catch Deidara's amused and approving gaze as he downed his own liquor more calmly.

"That was... um... good," She coughed, and offered a large smile, complete with watering eyes.

"You're cute, yeah," He declared happily, and Sakura inwardly beamed. She had gained his trust- well, a very loose definition of trust, which probably wasn't even a conscious emotion in an S-class nin's life -and she allowed herself a victory gulp from her cup. The second time wasn't so bad, and she quickly took a third sip. She downed it after that.

"A natural drinker," The bartender whistled, perhaps sarcastically, as he brought her another drink. "But really, you two slow down, especially since I highly doubt either one of you intends to pay." Deidara raised his hands, palms-forward, and insisted that he was an honest man, goddammit. The bartender batted away his ardent claims with one fat hand and moved to wake a customer who had fallen asleep at the end of the bar.

Deidara turned to observe her wordlessly as she swallowed down her next drink, and then part of his, and then cautiously lowered his hand, running it daringly along the expanse of her smooth leg. Sakura giggled, feeling a heat on her face that was induced partially by arousal and mostly by the burning alcohol in the pit of her stomach. She hadn't had too much of the drink, but she was a tiny girl, and she was an social (often, not at all) drinker. She leaned into his hand, causing it to slide accidentally under her skirt. Deidara grinned wolfishly.

Abruptly, an old man on Sakura's right clambered drunkenly to stand on his bar stool, teetering precariously as he surveyed the quieting room. The patrons were turning to face the man, who was gazing solemnly at the gathered room. The bartender rolled his eyes in the background, obviously familiar and unhappy with this strange customer.

The old man opened his mouth. Everyone waited. The old man narrowed his eyes, and then began to shout at the top of his lungs: "Ohhhh, I knew a sailor, a salty sea sailor, a rude old sailor who rowed out to seeeeea!" The bar remained quiet for a moment, and then burst into uproarious laughter and applause, and the majority of the male voices in the room joined in heartily for verse two.

"Oh, I knew a sailor, a drunk and hapless sailor, I knew a sailor who spoke these words to meeee," Deidara bellowed robustly, eye crinkled with mirth as he turned his attention to the singing man. Sakura hunched over in her seat, alarmed and disturbed by the volume of these strange proceedings. The bar erupted into song and dance, and no one seemed to notice as the old man wobbled and fell to the ground, giving into a drunken stupor. Sakura surveyed the room with clinical dislike. This is why she avoided these crowds.

Verses three and four ensued rowdily, and it was almost hard to picture Deidara as ever having killed anyone when he was so actively involved in the seedy bar's nightly choir rehearsal. He caught her eye and winked, and then let the song die on his lips as he leaned forward to kiss her clumsily. Sakura tensed markedly, screwing her eyes shut against the strong stench of alcohol on the man's breath.

The kiss was brief, hard, and passionless, but Sakura cracked her eye open after it was over, hoping that he would be returning for a second one. Instead, she found him calmly assessing her, all mirth gone from his face, replaced instead by a look of desire.

Sakura hesitantly leaned forward, closing her eyes again, hoping that he would meet her halfway. Deidara followed her shy lead, but stopped a hair's breadth away from her lips to whisper almost inaudibly, "I think this should be taken upstairs, yeah."

Sakura closed her eyes tighter, and counted to five. Her breathing sped up. There it was, as anticlimactic as could be; a sexual proposition from an Akatsuki member.

'He hasn't propositioned you yet,' Inner Sakura pointed out irritably, 'and he won't if you sit there with your eyes closed like a moron all night!'

Sakura mentally agreed, and when she opened her eyes she made sure that her jade gaze was filled with feigned (or maybe not so much, really) lust.

Deidara smirked and stood, offering his arm to her. Sakura accepted it appreciatively, and was surprised by the disorientation she felt as she pulled herself lightly to her feet. Her vision seemed to drag slowly, three steps behind the movement of her head. She was again perturbed by how little alcohol it took to affect her. Deidara noted this, and chuckled, and his proximity ensured that Sakura felt the rumble of his (very muscular) chest. She swallowed, feeling uncomfortably like she was in over her head.

**oooooo**

Deidara lead them slowly up the bar's wooden stairs, hand affixed to Sakura's lower back, helping her find her footing in the complete dark of the staircase. Sakura grumbled about termites and wood deterioration, and Deidara tittered lightly again. Sakura felt very attracted to him, and in the stuffy gloom of the hallway she couldn't help but feel sorry for what she was intending on doing. Then the darker side of her mind cautioned her feebly that he _was_ an S-Class criminal and an immoral killer. She had seen the wreckage left behind by his explosive clay birds; had seen the charred corpses of innocent people, as well as Leaf nin she knew and cared about. Her resolve strengthened, and she felt intensely grateful for the kunai hidden in a holster around her upper thigh. She mutely hoped that it would be enough.

"Here we are," He breathed, turning to a nonspecific wooden doorway in the shadowy hall.

Sakura took a cleansing breath, willing her stupid nerves away. She clutched him closer. He opened the door wordlessly, and swept her impatiently into the darkened room.

Sakura spared a hazy glance around, wide eyes taking in the basic layout of the room. Bed on the left, bathroom connected by a door to the right. She absorbed this immediately, and then turned to face her target, lifting a questioning eyebrow. He was staring at her intently. She loosened her grip on him, and staggered into the darkness gracelessly. He chuckled behind her.

"Is there a light?" She asked loudly, leaning on the bed with one arm as she used the other to remove her heels from her aching feet.

"I prefer it off," Deidara whispered, and Sakura leaped at his closeness. He was directly behind her, but making no contact whatsoever, and Sakura swiveled to meet his emotionless gaze.

"Yeah? Me too," Sakura agreed quickly, still uneasy but now filled with a sort of tipsy adrenaline.

"And I'd prefer your dress off, too, if you don't mind, yeah," Deidara continued smoothly, moving his calloused hands to encompass her small shoulders.

Sakura shivered and shook his hands away from her, instead moving to scramble onto the bed. "Come here then," she teased, batting her eyelashes seductively.

Deidara smirked and followed unreservedly, kicking off his boots in the process. Sakura waited, hesitant, curious to see what his next action would be. He pulled his shirt off casually, mesh sliding up over his taut muscles. Sakura briefly appreciated, again, his amazing looks.

"Why don't you take yours off too, yeah?" He asked, pausing in his stripping to stare at her hungrily.

Sakura nearly winced, remembering the very visible kunai holster strapped to her thigh. She tittered anxiously and loosened her kimono, beginning to slide her sleeve down one shoulder. Deidara seemed appeased and continued to his pants, quickly unzipping and pulling them down.

'This is it,' Sakura thought nervously. She hesitated, holding her kimono sleeve in a deathly vice. One hand drifted discreetly down to her thigh…

Then Deidara was behind her, pressing her backwards against the wall so that his front pushed enticingly into her back. Sakura gasped, uncomfortable with this vulnerable position.

"I... prefer it missionary," She murmured timidly, turning as much as this position allowed, lifting her full eyes to meet his own darkened ones. He began to stroke her hair comfortingly.

"Do you?" He asked quietly, smirking and pressing his face into the nape of her neck. Sakura nodded tersely. "Well, I'd prefer it if you'd remove your wig, _kunoicihi_."

Sakura froze. Her heart beat fiercely in her chest, drumming loudly in the tight clutch of her ribcage. She swallowed- a feat, considering the absolute dryness of her mouth. "I don't know what you mean," she whispered finally, so quietly that it seemed to shrink into the quiet void of the room.

"I guess I'll have to do it myself, yeah," he murmured, and clenched his fist into her wig, gathering as much of it as he could before he tore it painfully from her scalp.

Sakura hissed, feeling dozens of pins being jerked agonizingly through her hair. Deidara grasped the wig victoriously, now staring at her pink mane with previously-concealed recognition. Sakura used his temporary distraction to push herself away from the wall with a chakra-enhanced shove. Deidara leaped opposite of her, wisely choosing to keep his distance.

Sakura fell to the floor in a low crouch, eyes narrowed at him in contempt. "How long have you known?" She asked, feeling stupid and naive.

"All night," Deidara responded arrogantly, smirking sardonically. "I never forget a face, kunoichi- it's part of what's kept me alive for so long, yeah."

Sakura growled in annoyance, and leaned forward into her crouch. "So why did you even bother? You want to kill me?"

Deidara grinned wider and shrugged. "Life's all about enjoying the little things, yeah. Having a little fun. You seem to be missing _that_ part. I'm here to give _you_ some_ fun_."

Sakura snorted. "I assure you, I could have more _fun-," _here she ridiculed his childishness, "-being buried alive. At least then I don't have to pretend to like someone I hate."

"You hate me?" He feigned a look of hurt. "And yet you were _so_ eager to fuck me just moments ago, yeah. If you lay down like a good girl, we can even do it missionary." Deidara snickered.

Sakura flushed a deep red, embarrassed and terrified by the situation she had so naively caught herself in. "Fuck you!" She spat mindlessly, frowning deeper when he told her that she should be the one doing that.

Deidara dived towards her suddenly, and Sakura lifted her arm in a makeshift shield as she threw herself down and away, feeling him just barely missing her with his ill-timed lunge. She staggered to her feat inelegantly, widely brandishing the kunai from her thigh. He was already right before her, and his eye widened minutely at the sight of the drawn weapon. He hummed and glided backwards.

Sakura noticed, with minor embarrassment, that he was fighting her only in his underwear. Her kimono had slipped down both sides of her arms and now hung there tauntingly against the smooth expanse of her pale shoulders. Her heaving breasts were exposed. She pulled it up hastily, flushing.

Deidara watched her impassively, caught in pensive crouch. His arm shot to the floor quickly, steadying himself. Sakura nearly gasped with the realization that he must be terribly inebriated still, even if his long-honed fighting skills were masking that fact beautifully. She cautiously edged backwards, kunai held out in front of her in an unspoken warning. She glanced, panicked, to her left, seeking some form of escape. The window was securely closed and the curtains drawn, but Sakura was sure that it could be opened. Her optimism failed slightly as she heard Deidara laugh throatily.

"You look so much like a trapped rat, yeah," he called, adopting a playful tone despite the sinister nature of his remark.

"And you look so much like an ugly girl," Sakura snarled, gripping the kunai tighter.

Deidara's amused expression vanished, and then so did he. Sakura felt his chakra reappear behind her, so quickly that she didn't even have time to face him before she saw a flash and felt a large fist connect with her face. Sakura's head snapped downwards, and in the confusion of the moment she managed to pivot just in time to allow her face to meet his fist again, straight on. She flew backwards this time, skidding painfully against the rough wood floor. She instinctively brought her hands up to block her face, and noticed with horror that her kunai was noticeably absent from both hands.

Sakura jolted up, desperately looking around for her only hope at retaliation. The abrasive darkness of the room taunted her, and she choked down a panicked sob as her search revealed nothing. No kunai- but Deidara loomed right in front of her, looking stoically down at her from under his bangs.

He bent down slowly, watching her intently for any sign of a fight. Sakura hissed and pushed herself as far backwards as possible, bumping solidly into the bookshelf behind her. Deidara gave a warning growl and leaned towards her menacingly, grabbing a fistful of her hair.

"Stop," he ground out, "you're beginning to annoy me, yeah."

"Well, you've _been_ annoying me," Sakura spat, jerking her fist upwards in a valiant attempt at a surprise punch. He blocked the attempt with his arm and stood, yanking her upwards by her hair. Sakura cried out in a mixture of pain and surprise, and then violently lashed out with her legs. Sakura felt a kick connect vaguely with what she identified as his shin. He grunted in acknowledgement of what must have been a fleeting and unimportant pain, and then dragged her harshly towards the bed.

Sakura attempted another kick, which the young criminal deftly avoided. Deidara growled impatiently, turning them both to face the wall. Sakura struggled fiercely, praying for some momentary weakness. He grabbed one arm, and then removed his hand from her hair to catch the other, joining them together at an unnatural angle behind her. The pain was shocking, but Sakura refused to award him another sound. She bit her lip hard, eyes welling with frustrated tears. This wasn't how it was supposed to be at all.

Deidara hoisted her up by her hair, ignoring her threatening growl as he slammed her face-first into the wall. Sakura doubled over, gasping desperately in an attempt to recover the wind which had been painfully knocked out of her. A brutal thirty seconds passed in which she felt absolutely sure that she was going to die- no air would enter her vacant lungs -and she wheezed frenetically, unshed tears smoldering in her eyes. Deidara used her disorientation to his advantage, pushing her prone into the mattress forcefully. Sakura panted still, eyes clenched against the onslaught of hopeless tears. Her hands balled into fists behind her back, where they remained trapped uselessly.

Sakura struggled vainly against the man above her. He had her trapped unequivocally- his knee was in between her legs, separating them at such an angle that she couldn't even manage a proper footing to wriggle away. Her breathing came slightly easier now, though it hitched considerably with hysteria. Deidara laughed at her cruelly, hardly audible behind the rushing of air into her lungs and the beating of her frenzied heart, and then slowly pushed her dress up.

Sakura blanced with the realization that he wasn't just going to kill her. Shudders shot spastically up her spine as it dawned on her that she was going to be _raped. _She broke into hysterical sobs.

"D-dont," Sakura managed out feverishly, struggling to face him. "Just kill me! Anything but this-" A shrill ringing flooded suddenly in her ears and her vision was enveloped by a thick white haze. She realized belatedly that he had _slapped her_.

His mouth was next to her ear when her hearing returned, and he was telling her to shut up. "Don't talk again or I _will_ kill you, yeah." His breath was warm against her neck, and his voice was husky with lust.

He pulled back slowly, and deliberately made a show of grinding against her as he lowered his own underwear. Sakura buried her face desperately into the roughness of the comforter, finally giving into the heartbroken sobs that she had been fighting away. Her body convulsed uncontrollably with the force of her crying, and she was so far removed from the present that she almost didn't notice her panties being pulled down her thighs.

There was nothing gentle in the initial thrust, and in fact it hurt so appallingly that her tears became as much due to pain as they were of horror and misery. Deidara had forced his whole nine inches into her at once, burying himself in her tight warmth and groaning loudly in pleasure. The pain had conflagrated suddenly in her, so violent that Sakura felt like a virgin again, being entered for the first time- except that there was no sympathy or affection or tenderness in this carnal act, and she cried louder into the sheets.

**ooooo**

Deidara pulled out slowly at first, enjoying the feeling of her tight walls and her ass pressed against his hips, so lost in ecstasy that he almost released his unforgiving grip on her hands. He felt her violent shuddering and it heightened his pleasure, so much so that he thought worriedly that he might not last very long. Her sobbing- audible through she tried nobly to stifle it -was morbidly alluring, and Deidara thought grimly that he was probably the most guiltless rapist of all time.

He shrugged the thought off nonchalantly.

He began to thrust in and out of her at an increased tempo, in love with her tightness and her irrepressible wetness. He smirked. In some dim corner of her little kunoichi brain, she was horribly attracted to him. Her body told him what her mouth never would- she was very physically aroused by his presence, his nudity, and especially his sexual attentions, no matter how unwelcome they were mentally and emotionally.

His grinding slowed as he remembered to pace himself, trying desperately not to give in to this too-tight pussy and this sexy little nin. He glanced briefly at her face, half-concealed by the dark comforter. She was undeniably pretty; bright green eyes, delicately arched brows, tiny nose and long pink hair that pooled exotically around her pale shoulders. And, yeah, her body was great; decent breasts that bounced, hidden, beneath that little silk number, and a round ass that slapped erotically against his hips over and over as he plunged inside her. He had stumbled upon quite the catch tonight, and he wanted to make sure to enjoy it.

He quickened again though, spurred by the knowledge that he had already stalled too long here, and that sadly his Akatsuki presence was needed elsewhere. He rushed the last part of their forced intercourse, moaning loudly as he came generously inside of her. He pulled out, but not before leaning his mouth close to her ear to ask her what her name was. He grew impatient when she refrained from answering, instead sobbing even louder into the blankets. He pulled her hair roughly. She gasped and seemed to choke on her own dry heaves, and he pulled her head up from the blankets, noting with disgust the salty wet mess that her face had become.

"Fuck you," She snarled, though it was weaker than before, and her eyes were listless.

Deidara sighed impatiently and forced her back down to the bed, this time encircling her neck with his hands. "Just tell me and I'll leave you alone, yeah."

There was a moment of contemplative silence and then she muttered something unintelligible. Deidara tightened his grip to a harsh choke.

"S-Sakura," She managed out quickly, looking down with shame.

"Sakura…?" Deidara trailed, narrowing his eyes. He recognized her, alright- the little Leaf nin who had killed Sasori so long ago.

"Sakura Haruno," She growled, refusing to look into his eyes.

Deidara hummed in acceptance and pushed away from her, moving to dress, ignoring her as she curled into a pale little ball and cried harder. He rolled his eyes.

"I'll see you around, Sakura." He said blandly, trying out her name and finding that he liked it.

He thought he heard another murmured 'fuck you,' but he ignored it and slipped casually out the door.

**oooooo**

Sakura struggled to sit, gasping from the pain. She felt weak and pathetic, and in the accusing silence of the empty room she allowed herself to cry unabashedly, surprised by the brokenness of her own loud weeping.

**xxxxxxx**

**AN:** review if you want more, and before you ask, no it won't always be so morbid or unhappy or anything like that. I have some good ideas for the rest of this story, which I anticipate to be about 10 chapters or less. :)


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